Monday, September 11, 2006
okay, and thankful.
i think it's odd that one of the things i remember wondering about most clearly is if and when television would ever go back to normal; it seemed so impossible that we'd watch sitcoms again and peter jennings wouldn't be on camera 24 hours a day. it did, and now it's so normal that this is the first anniversary that snuck up on me.
i saw a tiny bit of some kind of 9/11 movie last night while i was checking to see if that show was on (i know, shut up), and in spite of myself something moved in my chest when i realized that what i was seeing was a depiction of the big before. i access the before all the time, so i don't know why a video approximation should cause the chest bubble, but there you go. i forget that the before could have lasted all the way to now, that there was a way for it not to happen that we didn't manage to find.
i also had a terrible dream about you, in which i was the bad guy, which is strange in that you are definitely the bad guy. it is highly doubtful that our prime time schedule will ever return to what it was, and we might not ever even talk about it, but on days like this i wonder if it wasn't maybe a big mostly blameless mistake, and i'm so glad you didn't die.
i saw a tiny bit of some kind of 9/11 movie last night while i was checking to see if that show was on (i know, shut up), and in spite of myself something moved in my chest when i realized that what i was seeing was a depiction of the big before. i access the before all the time, so i don't know why a video approximation should cause the chest bubble, but there you go. i forget that the before could have lasted all the way to now, that there was a way for it not to happen that we didn't manage to find.
i also had a terrible dream about you, in which i was the bad guy, which is strange in that you are definitely the bad guy. it is highly doubtful that our prime time schedule will ever return to what it was, and we might not ever even talk about it, but on days like this i wonder if it wasn't maybe a big mostly blameless mistake, and i'm so glad you didn't die.
