Tuesday, February 01, 2005
in other news,
it all goes forward.
we put an offer on an apartment yesterday. it's in washington heights, which is a perfectly nice neighborhood, if a little remote. it's a sweet little place. i am waking up in the night with some sort of anxiety-insomnia-hot flashes, which i'm sure are a result of Large Happenings involving the process of buying property and the aftermath of recent acts of violence. i lie awake thinking, where will the recycling tubs go in that tiny kitchen? and should i still walk to port authority by myself at two a.m.? and what about the bathroom tile? is it okay? will the commute to brooklyn make me regret the move? am i too much of a backtalker to survive a mugging? just how big is the storage area in the basement? is one of us going to die before we can get it together to get married?
these are not the best days, but i'm feeling a lot of grateful. i'm aware that i spend a lot of time meticulously counting what i don't have, which seems outstandingly arrogant in the light of current events. it's human and all, but i think it's a good time for a small (medium-sized, even?) break from the tallying of failure and not-having and woe-is-me.
we put an offer on an apartment yesterday. it's in washington heights, which is a perfectly nice neighborhood, if a little remote. it's a sweet little place. i am waking up in the night with some sort of anxiety-insomnia-hot flashes, which i'm sure are a result of Large Happenings involving the process of buying property and the aftermath of recent acts of violence. i lie awake thinking, where will the recycling tubs go in that tiny kitchen? and should i still walk to port authority by myself at two a.m.? and what about the bathroom tile? is it okay? will the commute to brooklyn make me regret the move? am i too much of a backtalker to survive a mugging? just how big is the storage area in the basement? is one of us going to die before we can get it together to get married?
these are not the best days, but i'm feeling a lot of grateful. i'm aware that i spend a lot of time meticulously counting what i don't have, which seems outstandingly arrogant in the light of current events. it's human and all, but i think it's a good time for a small (medium-sized, even?) break from the tallying of failure and not-having and woe-is-me.
