Friday, October 29, 2004
scratch that.
come on, park slope. big money.
it has become impossible to focus on anything but sleeping (or trying to; i'm still wakeful from about four a.m. on and the monkey said i ground my teeth so hard last night it woke up up), the show, and the unreal thrill park that is the NYC housing market.
we're actually still in the running for this incredible park slope apartment that i am not actually sure we can afford, but it has been pointed out to me that i am really being conservative and i would be willing to break out of my shell if toeing the line or stepping slightly over it meant we could live somewhere un-shitting-believeably awesome. (it has a deck.)
last night at rehearsal, even though i *quite* like the cast as a group and find them to be unique and intriguing people, i had the unshakeable feeling that i was in stepford. i was talking about the possibility of proposing small changes in the way we propose and rehearse new work, and . . . i swear people looked at me as if i had proposed the possibility of setting fire to the theatre. someone literally compared finding the best way to make art to finding the best way to make a macdonald's hamburger. suffice it to say, the rules are paramount.
this is hard for me to stomach. it is hard for me to hear the leader say that the only way this company can survive is to keep from "challenging history." i feel sort of patriot-acted. and shut down. and that innovative, cooperative collaboration is a wondrous goal that this company and i will not ever really share, no matter how much i like the people involved.
on the other hand, while i was typing that, the broker called to tell me we're still in the running for amazing apartment number 2. so. roll on, big river. lift my boat.
it has become impossible to focus on anything but sleeping (or trying to; i'm still wakeful from about four a.m. on and the monkey said i ground my teeth so hard last night it woke up up), the show, and the unreal thrill park that is the NYC housing market.
we're actually still in the running for this incredible park slope apartment that i am not actually sure we can afford, but it has been pointed out to me that i am really being conservative and i would be willing to break out of my shell if toeing the line or stepping slightly over it meant we could live somewhere un-shitting-believeably awesome. (it has a deck.)
last night at rehearsal, even though i *quite* like the cast as a group and find them to be unique and intriguing people, i had the unshakeable feeling that i was in stepford. i was talking about the possibility of proposing small changes in the way we propose and rehearse new work, and . . . i swear people looked at me as if i had proposed the possibility of setting fire to the theatre. someone literally compared finding the best way to make art to finding the best way to make a macdonald's hamburger. suffice it to say, the rules are paramount.
this is hard for me to stomach. it is hard for me to hear the leader say that the only way this company can survive is to keep from "challenging history." i feel sort of patriot-acted. and shut down. and that innovative, cooperative collaboration is a wondrous goal that this company and i will not ever really share, no matter how much i like the people involved.
on the other hand, while i was typing that, the broker called to tell me we're still in the running for amazing apartment number 2. so. roll on, big river. lift my boat.
