Tuesday, March 25, 2003

 
we were looking for the answer to a crossword puzzle clue we couldn't figure out, i swear to god, and that's why we ran a google search on the words "cheetah" and "luck" that turned up something i didn't know existed:

cheetah porn.

the story is set in a post-apocalyptic animal kingdom where an army of monkeys has enslaved all the felines. our hero is a young male cheetah quartered with a bunch of lions and . . . well, whoever, in a draconian work camp. while laboring with sledgehammers and fighting to save his tattered humanity in the face of austerity and oppression, the young cheetah comes of age. with the help of a slightly older male lion mentor, the cheetah accepts his homosexuality and experiences a physical awakening that involves "paw work," "droplets," and "hormone based daring."

in case you're wondering? the lion's manhood is three paw-fingers across and gently curved.

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